2018: A Year of
Milestone Anniversaries—Both Historical and Personal
A few weeks ago, it dawned on me that 2018 brings with it
three significant personal milestone anniversaries, with one connected to the
historical anniversary today of Martin Luther King, Jr.’s, death.
As was true across the nation, the news of the assassination
of MLK 50 years ago today brought with it disbelief, grief, anger, riots, and
curfews. For the Kansas City area, the curfews began on April 5, the same day I
arrived home from high school to find my 74-year-old father, who suffered from
Alzheimer’s, lying down in our front yard. He had fallen and broken his hip. Appropriately,
my mother rode in the ambulance that took him to Shawnee Mission Hospital and
gave me directions to wait at home for her call to pick her up. Because her
call didn’t come until several hours later, I was forced to drive the three
miles to the hospital, and, trust me, at age 16, driving under curfew in the
dark with no one else on the streets, worried I could be arrested, I was
terrified. Still, Mother and I made it back home safely with no police officers
stopping us. My father passed away a few weeks later shortly after the
assassination of Robert Kennedy.
Continuing on the personal anniversary theme, this year will
be the 100th anniversary of the birth of my half-sister, Edna May,
who was 33 the year I was born. Because of the difference in our ages, Eddie
seemed more like an aunt to me than like a sister, but I remember her for her
one-on-one chats when she would visit as well as for her unique birthday
presents—one being an ant farm, which, I’m confident, my mother came close to
banning from the house, especially when the ants themselves arrived in the
mail. To honor Eddie, my father’s side of the family will be participating in
our first big reunion in Breckinridge, Colorado, in June. I can’t wait for
Granddaughter Samantha to meet more relatives on that side of the family!
Finally, it was 25 years ago in February that my mother
passed away at age 88. Because I have a previous blog post recounting the
details of that day, I won’t do so here. Instead, because way leads to way, I’m
also reminded of several of my high school students I had the privilege of
teaching that year—many who kept me going as I was deep in grief, with one
student (one story), in particular, I must mention: Megan Denton was in my
creative writing class—she had previously been in my freshman honors English
class and frequently babysat for my son, then age 8. As was the
beginning-of-class practice, I started with roll call—this one simply reading
from a little book entitled I Have
Learned with the expectation that students would emulate its examples by
sharing something they had learned. Racing through a few pages, I was caught
off guard when I turned a page and read, “I have learned that when someone
special passes away….” I stopped reading as I tried to keep my emotions in
check but was unsuccessful and began breaking down in front of the class. Not
missing a beat, Megan jumped out of her seat, came to the front of the room,
took the book out of my hands, continued reading a few more examples, and then led
the class roll call. How blessed I have been to have had such wonderful
students!
Yes, this year is, indeed, one for milestone reflections and
embracing what I’ve learned:
- Sometimes we can’t separate historical events from our own personal ones, regardless of their insignificance to others.
- People might be surprised that they still have the power to bring family together even after their passing.
- Even in times of sorrow, we can embrace happy memories, too, and those long-ago happy memories can still make us smile!
- Finally, it’s indescribable how quickly the years pass yet how fresh the memories remain.
